Thursday, January 7, 2010

Naughties In a Nut Shell

The last decade, broken down:

  • Graduated from high school with honors...I was the valedictorian! But there were only two people in the class...
  • Spent a month in Pensacola with my best friend, Sarah, pretty much doing nothing. While there I got my first (highly regrettable) tattoo.
  • Decided to quit my high school job and enter the wonderful world of retail holidays. That lasted all of six weeks and left me unemployed on the day after Christmas...stupid K-Mart.
  • Discovered Weezer, Radiohead and the Beatles (super late, I know) through Andy and Alan, who insisted on playing the accoustic version of 'Creep' repeatedly every time we were in the car (I didn't mind...great song).
  • Dated Andy for two months, only to remember that I was 'in love' with another and didn't really like spending time with Andy. **Note--not the same Andy as named in the previous bullet point.
  • Tattoo number two--slightly less regrettable. Completed hours before a formal event resulting in my sporting a red satin gown and plastic wrap around my ankle, which barely prevented blood and ink from running into my shoes.
  • September 12, 2001 road trip with Mrs. Delph to Mountain Home, ID because all the air traffic was grounded. Missed Kendra's birth but made it there the day after.
  • Hurriedly decided to escape Oak Harbor by moving to Eau Claire, WI to live with my aunt...not the worst decision.
  •  Pierced my tongue as I left to drive to WI. Lied to my mom about the contents of my mouth while driving through Wyoming.
  • Failed to call out to 'the one' at CWU, resulting in years of what-ifs.
  • Dressed up like a hoochie for my first 'club' experience in St. Paul, was 18+ night.
  • Had my first taste of alcohol on the way to said club...Apple Pucker right out of the bottle.
  • Discovered a world of jewelry repair, winter coats and early morning inventory at JC Penney.
  • Spent months breaking up and making up with Chris, the crying boyfriend.
  • Can't remember 20th birthday. At all.
  • Returned to WA for a week or so for Adam and Holli's wedding, saw 'love of life' and remembered that he was so. Resulted in much mental anguish as crying boyfriend was present at that moment.
  • Lost hours of my life in a tiny bar in Arena, WI, population 416. Learned to wear turtlenecks to bar in order to deflect ice cubes thrown down my shirt from the other side of the room. **Note--Nobody checks IDs in WI.
  • Fell out with aunt, was asked to leave the house and decided with relief to move back to Oak Harbor.
  • Most awesome cross-country road trip with mom, left wallet in ice cream shop in Montana.
  • Road tripped to Mountain Home, ID with Christine, only to be stranded in the Tri-Cities in the middle of the night with a dead alternator. Best. Road Trip. Ever.
  • Desperation led to Wal-Mart employment. What. The. Heck.
  • Turned 21 and alchy, bar hopping six days a week. Became exhausted after five months of this.
  • Enrolled in Skagit Valley College approximately three years too late.
  • Moved into ghetto duplex with my sister, resulting in a few school nights spent sleeping in my car while she threw parties.
  • Very boring year...zzzzz
  • After five or six false alarms and several trips to the Donut House, Kelliauna was born, giving me my first close-up view of child birth.
  • Scholarships!!!
  • Returned to school after forgetting to attend for several quarters
  • Discovered Hedwig!
  • Made highly-influenced but very poor decision, garnering threat of legal action, but escaped by hurting someone pretty badly. Sorry Fer.
  • Realized that I was so far in debt that my entire income went towards credit card payments.
  • Moved back in with Mom and Dad. How embarrassing.
  • After six months of applying for jobs, Chamber ED took a chance on my inexperienced tush and I got out of Wal-Mart. Woohoo!!!
  • Scholarships!!!
  • Tracy happened, for lack of other entertainment.
  • Crossed Pacific Ocean for first time with Mom and Pleu the Psychotic Kitty, nearly missing flight to Japan because the clock on my mp3 player was set an hour back. Also because of Lindsey's flight delays.
  • Experienced first non-retail holiday in six years.
  • Survived first Holland Happening as event planner. Barely.
  • Got lost in Kamakura with my sister, only to discover that I knew my way around the Japanese tourist town better than she, the resident, did...thanks to getting lost in Kamakura with my mom the year before.
  • Discovered 'love of life' had married the love of his life.
  • Returned to school after forgetting to attend for several quarters.
  • Realized that I had no emotional attachment to Tracy and left without looking back.
  • Helped usher Josiah into the world...kinda.
  • A very specific alignment of fate and destiny allowed me to meet Paul
  • Fell in love with Paul in the Snohomish armory
  • Graduated from a two-year school...four years later.
  • Lost Paul because I didn't tell him.
  • Spent the summer travelling around Washington and Idaho, having much fun with the rebound. But my heart was elsewhere, resulting in many many lies and fights.
  • Hurt, hurt, hurt. This was a year of hurt.
  • Set off the first 4th of July firework while wearing the battallion chief's fire helmet.
  • Became morbidly obsessed with
  • Discovered a love of phallic monuments in Washington DC.
  • Designed my first brochure for Soroptimist Int'l with huge success.
  • Gave in to what I knew was right.
  • Got Paul back and discovered the lightness of heart that tells you you're doing the right thing.
  • Learned to trust
  • Spent a huge portion of my days in front of a web cam.
  • House sat
  • Waited, waited, waited.
  • Passed inumerable hours on Erica's couch, sharing a love for ER and bad horror movies (that better Erica? =D)
  • Spent two amazing weeks with Paul, who was on leave from Iraq. Discovered maybe for the first time that I was positively, absolutely 100% sure, beyond any doubt.
  • Met Paul's family one at a time, resulting in a sense of shock once I experienced them all together.
  • Learned that you really do just know.
  • Job search, job search, job search.
  • Paul came home! This event initiated a month and a half of commuting between Oak Harbor and Port Orchard twice a week and half-living in Maxine's guest room.
  • House hunt, house hunt, house hunt.
  • Experienced the overwhelming splendor of a very large family and the sense of belonging.
  • Learned that I am the only one I should be.
  • Discovered that girls make truly hot pirates while men make truly nasty wenches, and that I can't hold my Mike's Hard Lemonade anymore, especially when mixed with Pirate Punch and Grog.
  • Consequently learned that Malaluca parties are made 100 times more miserable by a fierce hangover.
  • Was strategically laid off and put my trust in Washington State Unemployment Insurance.
  • After months of uncertainty, we decided to live in Port Orchard and I left Oak Harbor behind me for good!
  • With much stress and tears, I learned (am learning) how to be a stepmom.
  • Signed at least the next year of my life over to the government.
  • Learned again, after 10 years of bitterness, to love the holidays.
  • Closed the decade by jamming out with my... never mind. Closed the decade next to the man of my dreams, the love of my life, and began the rest of my life.


Erica said...

A few of these bulletined items left me highly curious...I'll have to remember to ask you about them in person.

On another note, I do believe that you left something out. 2008/2009 ~ Met someone as equally obsessed with ER as myself! I think that is a pretty monumental event, lol! Which, by the way, season 12 comes out Tuesday!!!

Tiffany said...

This is awesome! I'm going to do this tomorrow...

Anonymous said...

what ta truely fantastic blog Dad A

Heather said...

:-D :-D :-D :-D

frikafran said...

Either we were bound collide by accident, or the roads we both were on was so crazy we just had to be together.

Good job!

Mom said...

So much was said, so much not said. You picked the perfect venue, as usual. xxxooo