Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Holy Random, Batman!

-This year, I'm oddly drawn to orange. Kind of a deep, burny orange. I might buy an orange cardigan. We'll see.
-Also, turquoise.
-But I always end up in black because I am afraid of color. Why wear color when you can wear black?
-My hair is not black, anymore. I don't know what happened, but it's brown, all of a sudden--very brown.
-But I have three bottles of hair dye waiting on the bathroom counter.
-Should I use them?
-Three minutes ago I looked out the window and noticed that the sky was blue. I got very excited and thought, "Maybe we can drive home with the top down today!"
-27 seconds ago I looked out the window and the sky is pouring buckets of rain.
-Today's weather is bi-polar.
-So is Lady Looney, but she takes meds.
-If this is her on meds, I'd hate to see her without.
-Today she got angry because the Gut Truck's chicken salad was made with grilled garlic chicken instead of the advertised crispy spicy chicken.
-She got very angry.

-But she ate the salad. And some ice cream.
-I had some ice cream, too. An ice cream sandwich, actually. It was delicious.
-Midterms are next week. I should maybe study.
-I've never been very good at studying. My friend, red-head Sarah used to help me.
-She would take notes and keep track of our assignments, because I suck at taking notes and I never could remember what homework I was supposed to do.
-And I would explain the concepts to make sure we both understood.
-We always got the same grades, down to the 1/100 point. But we never cheated.
-Sarah and I studied the detailed anatomy of the male and female reproductive organs together.
Red Canna, by Georgia O'Keefe
-But she mislabeled a particular part, so we got that bit wrong.
-It was a naughty bit.
-I studied Georgia O'Keefe in that class, and I recently decided that this would make a good tattoo.
-But I'm not sure where I would put it.
-It's a vagina.
-But I wouldn't put it there. Maybe a shoulder cap.
-Although I think I've gotten all the tattoos I want, and mostly ones I don't want after all.
-Sometimes I wish I could go back and shake my 18 year old self and tell her, "For goodness sake, don't get those dumb tattoos!"
-I would also tell her to not do the thing she decided to do when she was 23.
-But then, the today me would have fewer self-depricating jokes to tell.
-And sometimes nothing is funnier than laughing at yourself. You know...after the fact.


Mom said...

Twenty-three,twenty-three, hmmmm, I don't think I even want to know. There are still things I haven't told MY mother.

Erica said...

I love orange (it's the color of my pots/pans if you don't remember), and teal (it's the color of my tableware if you don't remember that, either!) and tattoos! And we all have times that we think we should attempt shaken baby syndrome on our young adult selves. If we didn't, then we wouldn't learn the lessons that we have learned and we would not be the people we are today.

honestabe said...

Reading this and several of your posts I went back read your Bio. You are truly ignoring your talents. You write with such flair. I am totally captured to read your posts fully. So you may suck at Racket Ball but you excel in writing. I can't wait for your first book;~)

Heather said...

Well thanks! =D I do love writing, but I don't always have anything to say. Gotta work on content...

Anonymous said...

how about a whole blog on Walrus'?
Dad A