Sunday, December 6, 2009

Retro Sunday

This morning I woke up to an e-mail from my mom. She tends to be bored on Sunday mornings before everyone gets up for church, and on this particular day she decided to visit Myspace.

I feel bad for Myspace. Its 15 minutes are over and we barely have the decency to visit, to pat its little head and assure it of its validity.

Anyways. She stumbled on some old blog entries of mine and told me to read them again. Here's what I found:

Aaaackk...puke...I've had an epiphany, a realisation, a new way of thinking that will forever change my life and the way I am. And this is the great part...Nobody ever reads these damn things, so I can blah blah blah all I want!!!! Brilliant! I can also use as many exclamation points as I want and not be accused of being in the 8th grade!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sweet!!!!!! So...I have discovered, are you ready for this? I've discovered I'm a cat lady!!!! Well, a future cat lady. I mean, I have cats now, but they're not mine. I just live with them. They just sleep on my bed a crap in my laundry room. But no, some day when I've saved up enough from my minimum wage paying job to buy a single wide trailer circa 1977, I'll be happy. I'll be happy in my single wide trailer with my 26 cats. That's right, 26 cats. One for each letter of the alphabet, and yes, they will each be named consecutively with a corresponding letter of the alphabet. Yay!!! I think I will name my first cat Anakin, because by then I should be a huge Star Wars freak, and maybe go to conventions and stuff, and spend hours sitting in chat rooms discussing...whatever it is that Star Wars-y people discuss. I'll find out some day after I've watched the movies. The second cat will be named Beaver, because that is really funny. The third cat...hahaha, you thought I was gonna sit here and name all 26 kitties! I could, but I'm not that lame yet. So now that I know exactly what my future holds for me, I can begin to plan ways of preventing that! Yay! It's this easy: college, brief stints of traveling (yeah right $$$), rich husband, pool boy, gratuitous charity work, midlife crisis...and I'm good!!

Interesting. I did NOT become a Star Wars freak, but I sure live with one! He didn't think the post was quite as funny.

I'm happy to report that I did not turn out as miserable as my 23 year old self predicted. While I do live with two cats, I also live with a wonderful man (neither millionaire nor pool boy) in a nice house (sans wheels) and I make more than minimum wage!

I hope you get a kick out of this. I know I did! Maybe it'll become a weekly feature...

P.S. The cats still sleep on my bed and crap in my laundry room.


Tiffany said...

Can I still be your friend if you get a rich husband? And can we share the pool boy?

Heather said...

Of course! and...well Tiff, that's kinky! =D